MRA Effect
by Eogrus
Summary: After defeating the whoreful Elsa on Earth, Rebecca Christiana Jasmina Xaila Rodrigues Diogo Velazquez travels to outer space in order to defeat the whore Asari and the even more femnazi Reapers!


Once again, another commission for my friends on Tumblr. This was easier to write than the other one, and I feel it's closer to their vision than the first. Once again, I do not follow MRA logic, but I understand and accept their worldview as different from my own, so if my friends want me to write this, I will.

Work Text:

Hello again.

After our triumphant defeat of Elsa on Earth, we MRA have been busy fighting against her fellow femnazi Moana, who took over Oceania. I wanted very much to kill that evil cunt - she deserves to be raped and enslaved extra hard for being a kiwi shit -, but I was called to deal with a bigger crisis. In outer space, we MRA have not had as much success, because of the devilful whore race the Asari. Those demon devil girls took over the galaxy with their rotten femnist desires of equality for all, and so have the Council entirely dominated by their shit encrusted finger nails.

As if that wasn't bad enough, the Asari are having help from the Reapers! Those ancient squid machines came from a time long before the patriarchy, and so they worship all the hateful feminist goddesses like Gaia, Sól, Isis - who has been thankfully defeated and is being raped by Jesus -, Kali, Gnowee and the most hateful of all, Hestia, the goddess of the hearth! With the powers of Hestia, the Reapers, the Collectors and the Asari have successfully enforced the Intergalactic Femnazi Empire, where men and women are equal by law and where everyone has the same job opportunities, civic security and protection and right for freedom of speech. I was so disgusted that I barfed my delicious lunch: honey donuts, chilli peppers, fried legumes, seaweed cookies, hamburguers made from the palm ligaments of muslimtard women, rhinoceros wombs and fetid placebos.

Anyways, I went to the MRA space station in the Vatican. I said goodbye to my master Putin, and I walked into the shuttle sexily, wearing a pink silk bra that showed off my nipples, a purple thong that went right through the labia of my pussy, white fashion model high heels with guns on them (like in Bayonetta), sparkly make up, black lipstick and exceptionally seductively pink eye shadow like the depths of a woman's mystery. My hair was held back in a sweet ponytail with ribbons on it, saying truths like Bible verses and GamerGate links. I entered the shuttle, and it took off very fastly and manly, like a penis through my arse. I sat sexily on a desk, showing off my good stuff to my new teammates.

"Hello, you must be Rebecca Christiana Jasmina Xaila Rodrigues Diogo Velazquez" said a sexy man with icy blue eyes like an american patriot's gnosis and shaved hair in the likeliness of manhood.

"Yes, I am" I said sexily, inviting him to rape my ass, which he did.

While he fucked my anal with my diarrhea as lube, I got to meet the rest of the team: Kaidan, Garrus, Joker, Vega, Javik and Tali. The first was a manly sexy latino man which I could tell was bi and repressing his hateful urges to objectify Shepard, which I helped by giving him a death glare and gesturing towards my guns. The second was a shy and cute bird-cat thing with blue eyes and markings like the Sun's dying breath in the Pleiades of another world, which I allowed to fuck my snatch; he had a duck-like penis that was spiralling and full of barbs, which ripped by carnicerous vagina walls to shreads, covering his manhood with blood and tumorous flesh. The third was an ugly midget man with a lot of beard, which I allowed to fuck my mouth. The fourth was a hot spanniard guy with abs like Hurricane Katrina upon pitiful houses in the shore, and I allowed him to fuck my left ear. The fifth was a former member of a hateful femnazi race that helped the Asari to be their regretful selves now, but he learned better ad was now fucking my right nostril. The last was a mistrustful pinkie bitch who was totally jealous of me as women should be, because women must always be fighting for men and crave for nothing else according to MRA.

"I'll be watching you!" Tali said bitchily and whorily.

"SHUT UP TALI GO MAKE A SANDWICH!" shouted Joker righteously and wisely.

Tali got all prissy like an exceptionally retard little girl and stomped away to the kitchen immaturely and childishly. Meanwhile, all the guys came into my orifices sexily, and I was full of their righteous manly cum that would soon enslave all women in the galaxy. After they cleaned themselves they discussed battle tactics, while I read a picture book about fairytales to entertain myself, as women should do according to MRA. It showed the story of Sleeping Beauty, a personal inspiration for me, as it teaches women to not do anything and rely exclusively on the male to rescue them and rape them and impregnate with with a future generation of strong, manly little boys, which in turn shall fertilise their mother.

"Rebecca Christiana Jasmina Xaila Rodrigues Diogo Velazquez, we have come to a consensus" said Shepard wisely and masculinely, "We shall make use of the only weapon that can defeat the hateful Reapers and their ancient lesbo goddesses, the Crucible! It is unfortunately guarded by the hateful Asari and their putrid clitorises, so we must convince them to lay down their guard so we can sneak in. That's where you come in! All Asari are misandric lesbos that do not let themselves be righteously raped by a man, but you can get close to them! They're all horny and deviant and very hot pervs who will gladly make out with any woman, so if you can seduce their whore lesbo matriarch Benezia they will be distracted enough for us to sneak in without the Reapers noticing!"

"That is a brilliant plan!" I giggled femininely and sexually, "I'm used to kiss other women for the sole purpose of titilating men, so that isn't a problem at all!"

"Garrus and I will come with you so you don't get indoctrinated by feminism" said James wisely.

So while Kaidan fucked my rotten snatch Joker set the coordinates to Citadel, the decadent jewel of the Intergalactic Femnazi Empire. It once was a dutiful military post full of MRA, but in the wars the Reapers killed all our operatives and the Asari took over with their false promises and obnoxious allures. Now, it is a disgusting hippie place full of flowers and perfumes and so much sunshine that it makes me diabetic. We landed on the port, a very well lit place full of rainbows and breast cancer awareness posters.

"Hello and good evening, dear people" said a hannar receptionist, he was clearly emasculated and deserving DEATH, "I believe you're the women reffered to as Bekie?"

"Yes, you shitty fag I mean very fine looking and pretty jellyfish" I whistled inoccently.

"Jellyfish is a very insulting slur towards my kind, you should check your privilege madam" he said calmly and reasonably, even though it was totally evil and he should be hanged for it.

"Whatever, I bet you want to be reffered as "xhe" or other dumb pronouns, you stupid cnidarian" I said wisely and upstandingly.

"You are a very rude and judgemental person, but I forgive you. After all, we must stand together against the MRAs and their opression."

I wanted so bad to smash that hateful hannar to smithereens, but Garrus bitchslapped me into my place. We followed it up an elevator, until we ended up in the Council room. There were three evil looking femnazi people: Udina, Saren and of course Benezia. The first was an ugly looking old guy wearing a wool jacket, a pink and white scarf, brown trousers, old fashioned black shoes, white socks, sunglasses, a nose piercing and an undercut with gel on his longer hair. The second was like an evil version of Garrus, wearing nothing but BDSM leather gear (black pants, two or four strips of leather loosely connected by metal rings on his torso, combat boots, a chastity belt) and a bear pride flag on his head crest. And Benezia herself was the ugliest and most dyke looking of all Asari, wearing a manly tuxedo, sinatra shoes and a massive, twelve meter long strap on.

"Ah, so you arrive" said Saren meanly and faggotly, he was clearly jealous of me for looking pretty and for having Garrus as my boyfriend.

"Now now, primarch, let us not be so hasty" said Benezia whorily and lesboly, liking her lips satanically at my sexual body like a devil serpent of woe.

We sat down on the council seats, and Udina went to bring in snacks: sparkly sugar cookies, penis shaped lolipops, breastful croissants and green tea. I was so disguted by that depravity that I almost vomited, but I and my coleagues controlled ourselves and ate in politeness. I only consumed the penis shaped lolipops, sucking on them erotically to arouse Benezia and Udina and disgust Saren, while Garrus and James tried everything but that, in order to be as manly as possible.

"So, we hear that you have information on MRA battle plans" moaned Benezia whorely, flickering her tongue like a skankly skink of evil.

"Indeed" I said cheerfully and sexily, "We have acquired precious files that forecast their battle strategies on Earth."

Garrus then showed a pink cassette with hearts on it - it was very disgusting to make, but we want to be hip with the femnazis so they don't suspect anything -, and put it on the transmitter. A huge hologram showing military battle drawings appeared.

"As you can see, the MRA seek to ambush our forces in French Polynesia" I said, wincing at "ours", "and subsequently take advantage and reclaim lost territory in New Caledonia, severely weakening Moana's army until it is forced to retreat to our posts in Hawaii."

"Cunning indeed, Moana is limited in French Polynesia due to the high amounts of sulphur dioxide that severaly incapacitate her naval fleet" said Saren gravely, "If the MRA are successful in breaching thrugh her defenses, our efforts on Earth might come to a grinding halt."

"We can solve this issue by merely sending Reapers to Earth" said Benezia evilly and stupidly, "The MRA do not have the technology to withstand our friends, and this will most surely restore morale to our troops!"

"Great idea Benezia!" said Udina eunuchly, "We shall send the Reapers right away!"

Crap, I did not predict this! Now our MRA earthly forces will be compromised if these hateful scoundrels send Reapers there! Still, this is why I was there, to distract them while Shepard went to the Crucible.

"N-now, before you do that, how about I entertain you" I said, winking sexily and licking my lips to entice, "I hear you're very tired politicians and need to relax..."

"Rebecca Christiana Jasmina Xaila Rodrigues Diogo Velazquez, this is not the time for frivolous sex!" said Benezia hatefully and devilly, "Can't you see there's important matters at hand!? Don't you have the minimum capacity for public decency!?"

Seeing no other options, I withrew my gun, breaking my masquerade happily. But just as I was about the shoot, the doors opened and many femnazi guards appeared to arrest us!

"HOW DID YOU KNOW!?" growled James vikingly, even though he was nigger skinned.

"We had a mole informing us of your dirty and lowly trick" cackled UADINA meanly, "so we played along with the charade, while our troops reinforced their defenses on the Crucible."

"You thought you distractd us, but in reality we distracted YOU!" laughed Soren maniacly and homosexually.

"And now your pitifully brainwashed and bigoted friends will be facing the whole might of the Reaper fleet, while we get information about your battle tactics as a free bonus" screeched Benezia sluttily, "Now just one Reaper, HARBINGER, will go to Earth NOW and put an end to your entire hateful organisation! HAW HAW HAW!"

This was truly our darkest hour. Shepard and his crew were now almost certainly dead, while a disgusting icky giant bug was going to kill my one true love Putin and send the Earth back to when Elsa was in charge! But I wasn't one to give up, I used my telekinetical dark powers to mentally communicate with Garrus and Vega in order to escape. I used my dark magic to choke out and decay the flesh of the guards, while Garrus shot away at the enemy bullets and Vega took out his knife to assasinate the femnazi politicians. But they were too strong: Udina took out a machete and threw at Vega's crotch, cutting off his dick, which Saren ate with much pleasure, while Benezia used her biotics to make tumours grow inside his balls and make them explode. Out of them came evil mutated spermatozoa, which formed a gray goo of DEATH that infected Garrus and made his eyes explode, then his metal flesh were fired from his body like nails out of an AIDS prostitute's hand, then his meat began to melt into a bloody paste that left only his blackened skeleton behind.

With Vega held down by Soren and with his genital area now an infected, bloody black hole being fucked by Benezia's strap on, I knew I had to go. I used my dark magic to teleport myself away to the corridor, and I made a run for the elevator. But there I fond an evil and disgusting woman, wearing a purple burka and helmet (basically like Tali in the video game). It was...TALI!

"You BITCH, you ratted us out! We promised you Heaven, but you gave us HELL! NOW DIE FOR YOUR SINS!"

And I punched her right in the helmet, breaking all the glass and making it perforate her hateful alien skin and smash her disgusting eyes. She screamed stupidly and sluttily, and I punched her in the face so many times until all her teeth were out of her sockets, all her skull bones were broken and all her muscles turned into bloody jelly. Then I punched some more until pieces of brain matter came out, and I put them in my pussy sexily, destroying her intelligence with the parasites that lived inside. She was finally dead, burning in hell for all eternity. Then I got a phone call.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA HOW YOU FUCK YOURSELF!" said...JOKER!

"WHAT!?" I asked questioningly.

"Tali wasn't the mole, in fact she went to warn you! No, the mole...WAS US!"

"Yes, we were playing you ALL ALONG!" cackled Kaidan fagly, "We have always been double agents for the feminists! There's no way in hell a bisexual man like me would serve violent homophobes like the MRA without a heavy dose of irony."

"Yeah,, and thanks to you me and my boyfriend will get a prommotion and enjoy our honeymoon in terraformed Pluto while your ass will be fucked by all the Reapers in the universe!" said Shepard evilly and gayly.

"YOU ASSHOLES YOU WILL ALL PAY FOR THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!" I shouted truthly.

But then I heard the guards, and I made a run for the nearest spaceship. I stole one controlled by a salarian and I killed its owner by shoving his fact up my cunt, where all the semen from MRA men drowned him to death. I went to outer space but then I heard an ominous sound...ALL THE REAPERS APPEARED!

"CHECK YOUR FUCKING PRIVILEGE!" shouted Harbinger hatefully like a potato smashed by voidless eons of consternation.

Then they started firing lasers at me, but I dodged every hit because I was right and they were wrong. I used my godly and jesusly darkness powers to overwhelm some of them, but they were too many. Suddenly AN IDEA I HAD! I put on the autopilot to dodge while I kneeled down and prayed.

"Oh Jesus my lord and saviour, send a sign to help me defeat these hateful transgendered octopodes! May their dysphoria be their doom and they all die of AIDS!"

And my prayers were answered, because in the void of space Putin appeared! He was glowing in a glorious red light, and he exploded all Reapers!

"Putin, you saved me!"

"Everything for you, my sweet pussied anaconda woman!" Putin said lustfully and chauvinistically, just like a true MRA should.

So I flew down to earth, safe. The mission was fullfilled after all, all the Reapers were dead, but the Empire was still active, and our fight continued.


End file.
